Emotional Well-Being for the Caregiver
BEV MALLETT | Wellness Committee
R etirement can be a time of great joy , bringing a sense of freedom to enjoy experiences that we did not have time to pursue during our working lives . Some people choose to travel , develop new hobbies , take a part-time job , or volunteer in their community . Many retirees find great joy in becoming more involved in the lives of their grandchildren or other family members . All these activities encourage a sense of emotional well-being . Emotional well-being — a key dimension of wellness — is the ability to cope with challenges , manage stress and engage in positive , respectful interactions with others .
But , what happens to our emotional well-being when we retirees become the caregivers of , or at least assume responsibility for , one or two and , in some cases , three generations of family members ? Our generation has often been called the ‘ sandwich ’ generation . Recently a friend was asked , “ Are you a single-decker , double-decker or tripledecker sandwich ?” For perhaps the first time in history , it is not uncommon for four generations of a family to still be alive .
Having elderly parents who need help dealing with medical , emotional and financial issues can be a very real challenge . Many of us have the primary responsibility for ensuring that the needs of elderly family members are met . Others , through necessity , have taken on a major role in helping their adult children — and often
grandchildren — as well . Assuming such responsibility for adult children or grandchildren is sometimes necessary for short or longer periods of time in the life of a retiree . The downturn in Alberta ’ s economy has also affected many retired people and their family members ; some of us have adult children who have lost their jobs and their homes and need help surviving a very difficult time in their lives .
Because we care about those we love , we can find ourselves in situations of helping family members that can drain our energy and require major changes in our own lives . We may have to alter our own hopes and dreams for retirement .
Caregiving can be physically and emotionally stressful . Often , we give priority to the needs of others , which can lead first to exhaustion and then to feelings of sadness , hopelessness , anger and often guilt . Living with a spouse or family member who has a chronic disease may also result in feelings of isolation and loneliness , and ultimately can affect the physical health of the caregiver .
The National Initiative for the Care of the Elderly ( NICE ) has suggestions for Caregiver Self Care . Physical activity is at the top of the list . Many people believe that , as we age , we will slow down and do less and that physical decline is inevitable . Many aspects of physical frailty , however , are due to inactivity , disease or poor nutrition and can be reversed by improving lifestyle behaviours .
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